I guess most people have their ups and downs, times when they feel great and then moments when they feel blue. This is normal and not too much of a problem for most people to deal with. My Vanessa is an exception. Most times she is a source of strength, a great 'doer', full of energy... you know, one of those creative people always buzzing with ideas. She pays a penalty for her creativity: now and then, she goes through a terrible blue period when she departs from our world into one of darkness, isolation, and a blind kind of awareness. It is not like your normal blues at all. 

'Trick-cyclists' have a name for it. They call it depression! It's only a name, but for my honey it is a glass cage, a living death, or - as she puts it -"...a dying life!" 

I know it takes a lot to bring someone back to the world of the living. So when a gal yer love as much as I love Van goes thru this much pain, yer just pull out all the stops to make a difference. That's what I did, the week before Easter 98, when I phoned MOL and asked if we could join him and ANNE on their trip to Edinburgh. I knew Van was too weak to help 'em in the  MIC-UK workshops at Gorgie Farm but we could at least meet up with our friends and spend some time in a different environment. Maybe, I thought, this would help Vanessa catch hold of something from within her gloom and trigger a recovery. 

Little did I know then what an extraordinary week was ahead of us, or the startling adventure which would lead us both into darkness, mystery, and discovery. This is a complete account of something which is accessible to you all. Van is improving quickly now due to the spark of interest this adventure gave to her. I guess people forget that microscopy is more than just looking at life down a microscope... it is often an introspective thing which helps us cling to the beauty and mystery of the world when times are hard, and when it would be far easier to succumb to the pressures of life... and fade away into the darkness! 

I hope you learn something hidden from our account as well as discovering more about a fantastic night creature. I could have just told you all about bats but Vanessa said it was important to capture the atmosphere of our encounter with  them and the background to the events and subsequent studies which took place. Most important of all, it was vital to show how something much feared in the darkness and little understood by ordinary folk, can itself be a thing of great beauty - leading to greater awareness of ourselves and our world.